So, one evening I was sitting around and the impulse stuck me to pursue the CVI, (cortical vision impairment), Endorsement being offered through Perkins. Looking back I am not even sure what triggered this thought of mine, but I was adamant and took to my phone and began texting a colleague of mine who is endorsed herself to get her feedback and guidance. The general consensus after speaking with her and my other colleague who is also endorsed was to take the scoring of the range class which I was afraid to hear…
Scoring the range has never been my strong area of expertise. I like the one on one direct instruction aspect and working with teams and students modeling techniques to best work with our students. Watching the look of annoyance, because lets be honest… not all teams are full of rays of sunshine when you are telling them that what they are doing is ALL WRONG… to seeing the Aha Moment when the tiniest modification changes their outlook on instruction. Of course my delivery is much sweeter and softer, but the message is still the same. Lol
The range however was, (actually still is), a little intimidating to me. I always tend to over score my students and try and give them credit for more than they can truly do. If I see a reaction or action one time, I am not ready to say they are “resolved” but I know I can be overly positive when scoring which I know is a No-No. I knew the process of scoring and the characteristics of course, but trying to match up a student and best describe them in a checklist can be difficult when a student borders on two statements on the range.
I had committed to the course and it took 6 weeks to complete. It could have taken 5, but with my poor time management skills juggling a full time job, three kids, and carting our oldest to his activities after school I was exhausted and took the second week offered for the final project. The assignments were not overly difficult and my instructor, Sandy Newcomb, was awesome. She was great at explaining concepts in her lectures and was very thorough in her review of the assignments we submitted justifying how she scored the students. Overall, I learned a lot and am grateful that I took the time to participate in the course.
With me ALWAYS scoring my students higher, I decided to be more conservative in my final project submission and it totally backfired on me. I underscored and was apparently a bit too stingy with my scoring than I should have been. Our final project consisted of watching videos and scoring 2 students on Range 1 and Range 2. I have to admit, I do not like observing from a video. I feel there is so much that can be taken in incidentally when working one on one with a child that can be missed based on camera angles, etc. I hit send on my project and waited.
Well, you can imagine how I felt when I found out I had only gotten a 50% on my submission… yes, 50%. Not 50 out of 60 either… 50 out of 100!!! I was crushed. I do not think I have mentioned this before in any of my post, but I am an OVER ACHIEVER! In graduate school I do not think I got a grade lower than an A in anything. I don’t know why but it was so overwhelmingly frustrating that I logged out and did not go back to the website until today as I write this post.
The funny thing is, I was not upset at Sandy or Perkins or the CVI Range because clearly it was not any of those things that contributed to my poor score. I was disappointed in myself that I had taken the time away from my family over the 6 weeks to do course work and I felt I had nothing to show for it. I was disappointed that I had let my students down and that if I cannot pass the course, how would or could I ever pass the Endorsement test?! My epiphany came only as I am typing this post as I realized that the coursework is still accessible to me, and now I can go back at my leisure and review and try to absorb more than I did the first go around. I have chosen to get back in the fight and give it another go!
Scoring itself is not difficult as you go through the list, but for me the challenge lies in separating the emotion from the fact. I want my students to be successful as all teachers do, but I have to be sure that their success is scored accurately to better serve their teams. When I was student teaching I felt that I was able to be more objective in my scoring as I did not have history with the student or their family making scoring an easier task. I have to try and remove myself more from the personal connection and focus on the scale itself.
Long story short, I realize I am not confident enough in the scoring aspect of the test to take the test for endorsement. I may not be for awhile, due to the fact of my being a scaredy cat to not score well, but I will continue to share my triumphs and defeats as I go! I would be interested to hear of others and how